Way back when I was a new teacher, there was a mom who was mad at me… very mad at me. This was my second year teaching, I think, and my first year in sixth grade.

25 years later and my memory is a bit hazy, but I think I remember enough. Her daughter was in student council, and once a week or so she would miss the first part of homeroom. She would miss the start, or maybe the end of our daily journal writing. Even though part of being on student council was the understanding that you would need to make up missed work, she had a hard time finishing those half page journal assignments.

I guess she earned a B on the journal assignment one marking period. If my memory serves…

Mom was mad.

She said, “My daughter is a great writer. She doesn’t need to do these assignments.”

She said, “My daughter is in student government. She doesn’t need to do these assignments.”

She said, “My daughter doesn’t get B’s.”

I don’t know if this was one phone call or three. I don’t remember if there were meetings, or if there were emails. I mean, there was email, like email was a thing… But not as much email. Maybe there was a hand written note from home!

I do know that the teacher across the hall, my mentor and friend Mardi helped me through this tricky situation. (And many more situations after this.)

She told me that sometimes you just have to ask, “What would you like me to do? What grade would you like your child to have?”

It doesn’t solve every issue, or every miscommunication. but, it does give pause.