I’m on the deck, just E and me. Our dinner was rushed, and I notice that the chair pillow is indeed wet from the rain a few days ago. It had just needed time to soak into my pants.
But still, I sit there, just taking a minute before clearing the table. I’m just taking a minute.
I look at E’s 8-year old foot, scooched under his butt as he eats a few chips. The bottoms of his toes are barely visible, and the bottom of his foot has a perfect wrinkle.
“This is what I notice?” I think. I’ve been thinking a lot about what I notice, what I’m thinking behind what I’m thinking, what I want to remember.
Yes. This is what I notice. I want to remember this foot, scrunched and wrinkled. I want to remember this foot, bare on a finally hot spring evening.
I get up to clear the table and E asks me, “Why do you look kinda sad, momma?”
“I’m not sad.” I say.
And later I will wonder if I should have taken that teachable moment to talk about being contemplative.
Or, maybe I should have just taken another minute on the deck, just E and me.