What do you notice on a quiet day?

I passed a man on the phone outside of Home Goods
Heard him say calmly,
“Well, the big thing for me is, I got blood vessel deterioration in the brain.”

I kept repeating his words in my head, I didn’t want to lose them
Well, the big thing for me is, I got blood vessel deterioration in the brain.Well, the big thing for me is, I got blood vessel deterioration in the brain.Well, the big thing for me is, I got blood vessel deterioration in the brain.Well, the big thing for me is, I got blood vessel deterioration in the brain.Well, the big thing for me is, I got blood vessel deterioration in the brain…

Just before, there had been an elderly woman with her daughter ahead of me.
The checkout lady tried to convince her get the store credit card.
Her daughter was silent.
Was she even paying attention?
As her mom was about to sign-up she finally spoke,
”Mom. It’s a credit card. Do you want a credit card?”
I had wondered if this was the daughter’s technique.
Was she giving her elderly mom independence?
Or, was she annoyed and ignoring?
Either way she stepped in.

Now, I see them walking to their car ahead of me,
the mother’s arm in her daughter’s.

I walked to my car thinking about how
fleeting life is.
Everyone gets old.
Blood vessels deteriorate.
I’m the daughter who will help my mother to the car.
I’m the mother who will one day put my arm in my daughters.
Oh, and also, how death is around the corner.

That’s when I told myself to
stop noticing
so much.
What we notice makes our world, I guess.
So, I told myself to notice the sun,
blue sky
crisp air
instead.

On the drive home I wondered
would it be easier to
not notice?
Maybe it’s better to go through life
in the moment
not making connections and stories.

Or, would I rather be this
person who notices too much?

And also – I really hope that man’s blood vessel situation is treatable.