Weekend starts on Wednesday
So they call this Spring Break
It’s a little warmer outside
So they call this Spring Break
A movie on, a pile of books
So they call this Spring Break
A deep breath, an extra snuggle
So they call this Spring Break
Am I the kind of person who thinks it’s okay to keep a ziplock bag of chocolate chips on the counter in an unused pot?
No. No. No. I assure you, I am not.
I think it started with a bag of mini chocolate chips my daughter liked to add to her yogurt
with granola and fruit
Then the kids started throwing chocolate chips in their hot chocolate this winter,
which was cute.
I noticed the chips started staying out on the counter only recently,
and the ziplock bag in a pot thing?
That started just last week.
Am I the kind of person who had some of those chocolate chips, with a dollop of peanut butter on a spoon?
Yes. Yes… I did that just this afternoon.
Am I the kind of person who thinks those chocolate chips would look prettier
in a big mason jar?
I mean, if they are going to be on the counter . . .
If you can’t beat ’em,
join ’em.
March 8th
March 8th. sunny, spring is in the air for now. Kids are out on wheeled things "spring break" is two days off later this week Kids and I really wish we were going somewhere. Anywhere really. Any. Where. Before that, March 8th - 2020 we drove to Georgia mountains and hikes and family time and laughter and fireplaces and wine. Our last pre-pandemic normalcy. We knew something was happening - but not really. We clorox-wiped the vacation house, we didn't go to crowded places… but it felt normal. happy. We even brought the dog! Our Georgia trip felt like family in a cabin, but not a cabin-fevered family. Before that, March 8th was Finnegan Foxy Feinberg's birthday. Always during spring break, He’s always at the "Pet Resort" for his birthday. Our spring breaks were never fancy, but they were breaks. Before that, March 8th marked the anniversary of my father-in-law's death. A day to remember him, gone now for over 20 years. A character we wish he had seen our wedding, We wish he had met his grandchildren. Every March 8th I will remember him and feel lucky that I got to know him. Before that, March 8th was just a normal day. I'm sure spring was in the air sometimes, other times there were blizzards. I'm sure life looked normal - headed on a vector I didn't notice just living life. Now I wonder. What will March 8th look like next year? March 8th 2022 March 8th 2023 March 8th March 8th What will the March 8ths of the future have in store for us?
Sunday
Sunday sleep
Sunday coffee
Sunday bagels
Sunday work
Sunday friends
Sunday walk
Sunday work, work, work
Sunday family
Sunday dinner
Sunday laundry
Sunday dishes
Sunday write
Sunday work
Sunday sleep, sleep, sleep
I don't believe in hate she said hate is like this coffee cup you keep staring at the coffee cup saying "wow that's some terrible shit." just put the coffee cup away and since I don't believe in hate that should be easy she said to push away hate with nuggets of gold fill yourself with nuggets of joy that feel light and joyful and there won't be any room for hate and since I have a video series all about joy that should be easy I'm just wondering if maybe I might be allowed to smash the coffee cup to the ground first watch it break into a million pieces before I vacuum it away and look for those nuggets
Look at me! Writing in the morning. In the morning!
My cat wakes me up now, along with my alarm. He pushes things one by one off my nightstand.
The sun wakes me up now, along with my cat. It’s a spring-is-coming sun. The snow seems to finally be melting. It might be green here again soon, instead of never.
My morning coffee-on-the-porch routine seems like it might return soon, instead of never.
Look at me! Writing in the morning.
My coffee is by the window and the sun is shining through. In the morning!
From my couch, I can stare at the picture of my grandma’s house.
I can pretend I’m back there on Borbeck.
Is this how time travel works?
How does memory work for you?
Can you remember whole days? Close your eyes and remember entire conversations?
How much continuous memory can you have at a time?
Is it like time travel?
Or are you like me — do you remember things in slices?
The toys under the dining room hutch.
The big table with blue and white dishes.
A column between the living room and dining room – perfect for leaning.
Aunts and Uncles and cousins filling the living room with the glow of big Christmas Lights on the tree in the corner?
M&Ms and ice cream served with pretzels.
The way the sidewalk led down to the garden shed.
The sound of the porch.
The azaleas.
The shelf in the corner with photo albums.
The saltines in the canister on the kitchen counter – cookies were sometimes in the next canister over.
And oh – the chalkboard in the kitchen.
I had to stand on the vinyl chairs underneath, but once I was up there…?
Oh that chalkboard.
It was meant for chores, I think. A leftover from the 10 children household.
But to me it was a place to draw, to list important things, to play school.
I can’t travel back in time,
but I can sit on the couch and stare at the picture of my grandma’s house.
L wanted to get out of the house.
“Shopping with you is my favorite!” is what she said to entice me to go to TJ Maxx.
Later it was “I love you mama. Do you think you can help me buy just a few of these things?” to entice me to buy her a few things.
I don’t love shopping during a pandemic, but we have masks, and don’t stay long.
I don’t love going out at night ever because, well… night time? That’s supposed to be pajama time. But, I do like spending time with my almost-leaving-me-for-college daughter. Also I noticed a sign that it was the right thing for me to do.
TJ Maxx is a fun place to be. And I do enjoy looking at the notebooks, and wandering around telling myself that I can enjoy looking at the inspirational signs, but I don’t have any space for them. Even if they seem perfect.
As I wandered around the store, a young man’s voice came over the loud speaker. He was thanking us for shopping and telling us about some deals. He sounded so happy about these announcements, and it brought be back to my store announcement days: The summer after my freshman year of college when I worked in the lingerie department of Boscov’s.
Man did I love when I was supposed to make those storewide announcements. It was the best part of my job.
I wish I were one of those people with really specific memories to share – because as I walked around TJ Maxx, I thought about how I’d love to tell you how I made those announcements decades ago. But, I don’t even remember if I picked up a phone to do it, or if there was some weird microphone. Did I have a quota of announcements I was allowed to make? Was there a time where someone told me not to make so many or such long announcements? Did I look at that week’s flyer to help me say what I needed to say? Did I make the announcements only about lingerie? These questions will never be answered.
I can however tell you that I loved making those announcements. It was almost a dream come true, almost as good as it would have felt to have gotten to work a grocery store cash register, or be allowed to click the library cards into the library card punch when I worked at a library. Those are a couple of my biggest never-realized dreams: the cash register and the library punch card. But making an announcement at Boscov’s? That’s on the dream list. Almost.
I wanted to find the TJ Maxx announcer and tell him he should write down this experience for later. But, then a candle caught my eye, and also the soft soft shirts, and more notebooks. . .
Teach Like Your Shawl’s on Fire
I wanted to tell you that I’ve been trying to time my math class and teach like my pants are on fire – or at least like my shawl is.
But when I went to find the picture I knew I had, of me in my new shawl from my mama, I realized how helpful that shawl really is – because I no longer have to keep warm with actual blankets.
This is probably why my mom made me my shawl.
Because it’s hard to teach with urgency, if you are wrapped in a blanket and holding a cup of tea. (Don’t worry – I put my coffee away to teach.)
I wanted to tell you about this urgency because today I was rocking it! I mean, I don’t want to brag or anything, but my times were really within 5 minutes of what my plan said. I even started explaining the breakout room directions 3 whole minutes before the 1:45 goal!
Listen. If you’ve ever taught with me or next to me or down the hall from me, you know this is a big deal.
By 2:35 (ish) I was almost ready to send the kids off to their WIN time! I had my slide projected with the assignment! I was so excited to give them the rest of the time to work: They could sign off of google meet, or stay on to work with me.
I was so proud.
I said, “Who here can help anyone who doesn’t remember how to upload to google classroom?”
I looked around at their faces in the google meet boxes. Usually hands would be up. There are a lot of helpers.
“Oh,” I said. “I think you are all frozen…?”
And then my google meet went away.
And then my internet went away.
And then one by one the rest of my family came up, down, and around to tell me that their internet was down.
H said, “We were in the middle of a very important conversation! The teacher was very passionate! His screen froze like this!” And he posed, mouth open, eyes wide, hands up in the air.
I said, “But – were you in the middle of teaching a fourth-grade math class?”
And then I tried to text a parent so they could tell the kids that my internet was off. But the text wouldn’t even go through as a text.
So I told myself that these are fourth-graders. They can handle it. And I just waited for the internet to reboot. Which it did around 3:00. I checked in the google meet, wondering if any fourth-graders would still be there. (They weren’t)
I still had my shawl on, but I should have taken the opportunity to sit with my new back massager… I can’t teach like it’s on fire, but it is heated!
I mean, a teacher should take a 15 minute break when it’s handed to her like that, right? (Next time. I’ll do that next time.)
Part of Slice of Life by Two Writing Teachers March Slice a Day Challenge! I’m slicing every day this month. Thanks for stopping by.
Old Witch Hands I can't stop thinking about the way that old witch hands look in fairy tales fingers wrinkled (not just skin) gnarled, warted my acupuncturist says that the cysts I have on my pinky fingers are on my heart meridian because my heart is broken (not just bent) gnarled, warted - I guess so I tell her that I can't stop thinking about old witch hands in fairy tales now "You mean they are just broken-hearted?" I sob at this thought I empathize even more than normal with the witches - with the witches (because that's what I need now - more empathy for witches) sarcasm intended "There are lots of reasons not just heartbreak, Ona," my acupuncturist tells me I tell her that it's not fair it's not fair 2020-2021 is hard enough without my fingers erupting with heartbreak she tells me to thank my body "Would you rather have a heart attack or a cyst on your finger, Ona?" she asks me. she's right, but I can't stop thinking about the witches in fairy tales.
the musings of a high school science teacher
Tales of a Doc student's readings
erratic thoughts too loud for lines
Small slices of my life, in one place!
Celebrating the Randomness of Life
On a Thought 