Currently, I am
Watching Marvel movies with the boys
and Ozark by myself
hoping they aren’t overhearing the dialogue
Listening to music whenever I can
Music to study by while I work and write
my goodbye 2020 playlist in the car
blues or classic rock when I am doing chores
Brené Brown on dog walks
I tell Alexa to play spa or meditation music at bedtime
Reading Good Morning Monster
more slowly than I usually read
worried that I’ve had it too long
Needing to give it back to my friend
Napping when I can
on the couch, or better yet the deck
in the sun
with the dog nearby
Wondering which leads to
Worrying – all part of my
Trying to practice my
4 thoughts on “Currently I am”
Ona, there’s so very much to this poem. I connected with you all across the way. For one, what I listen to really does drive my mental state, without a doubt. I also smiled at the image of you napping on the deck in the sun – one of my favorite feelings.
As for the last two stanzas, YES. I sighed, I nodded…I think you speak to lots of us out here…
Great post – (You keep that book until you are finished). A lot of S*^# here and I’m sorry. This is what you have, and there is nothing you can do but look at that gaping hole. But soon it will change. Choose your time to mourn each day so it doesn’t sneak up on you. Give it and opening and a closing. You are made of much more than you know and your cocoon is well-made. What’s inside will surprise and delight you. You must mend and knit and become! I believe in Y O U .
I love this slice, the way you lead us through your “currently.” Like you, my wondering often leads to worrying and overthinking. I struggle to be patient and understanding with myself in those times, to practice my listening. Thank you for the reminder.
It’s a function of my myopic grandma mind that I thought Good Morning Monster would be a picture book. So glad that you have music and movies and napping and reading to accompany you during this challenging time.