All posts by onathought

March 1 A Teacher Like You

Reflections on coaching, Reflections on teaching, Slice of Life
I’m writing every day of March for the Slice of Life Challenge at Two Writing Teachers.

I’ve been spending time in third grade lately. We’ve been writing up a storm in our notebooks. They are filled with our thinking work: words and sentences, claims and reasons, taped in pieces of evidence, to-do lists… They are a beautiful mess!

Today, the teacher started by reading Abdul’s Story by Jamilah Thompkins-Bigelow and the kids were rapt with attention. So was I.

In this story, Abdul loves to write, but struggles too. (So do I.)

But then a published author comes to his classroom, sees how upset Abdul is about his messy work and says, “I want to show you my notebook.”

This is one of those picture books that cause watering eyes and a tingling nose.

Of course, the author’s notebook is messy. Writing is messy. Abdul is a writer!

The story is sad before it’s uplifting, and when Abdul was having a particularly hard time with his writing, the boy sitting in front of me couldn’t hold in his comment.

“That’s where he needs YOU as a teacher!” He shouted out to his teacher.

That might have been when my eyes started to water and my nose started to tingle. It was just so sweet, so perfect. I must have made a sound like, “Awe.”

He turned around, eyes big. I think for some reason he felt bad that he didn’t include me. It wasn’t necessary but it was nice when he added with a smile, “Or you!”

Magic Poetry Slice

poetry, Slice of Life

Part of Slice of Life at Two Writing Teachers

The live Verizon agent wants me to
allow them
a
moment

they want to know
“how your day going has been so far.”

Oh, Live Agent
Let me speak to you in poetry
instead of expletives
Maybe poetry is the
magic
my phone bill needs. . .

How my day going has been so far —

My dog chewed something he found in the trash
again
My dog keeps trying to sneak upstairs
again
My cat is trying to steal the onions
again
This is how my day going has been so far

From my couch, I can see the laundry
I folded it
last week
and the bills I just paid
bills!
I should be working
This is how my day going has been so far

I am once again on my phone with
yet another live chat agent
This is how my day going has been so far

There have been so many
lies
on these live chats
I have renamed them,
Lie chats
This is how my day going has been so far

This Verizon Agent
Oh, this Verizon agent
is trying their best

I appreciate them
doing their job
but I might throw my phone across the room
anyway

“You’re like family to Verizon and we can’t let you unhappy at any point.”
This agent tells me

And maybe this poem
is magic
because this Verizon agent
My favorite one so far
Assures me that they will take care of it for me

There is hope
The sun is going down
My dog is resting
and my favorite Verizon agent signed off
“Your appreciate is my trophy,” they tell me

It’s like they know I’m writing poetry

I can’t write

Pets, poetry, Slice of Life
Part of Slice of Life at Two Writing Teachers

this is boring
and I don’t expect you
to read it

writer’s block
must mean I’m actually
a writer

even my journal
the self-love guided one
is closed

oh, I was gonna write
but then the cat fight happened
woke up the dog

now every line
is interrupted by my shouting
FINN STOP IT

he can’t stop
the cat food is just sitting there
calling his name

even at 6 am
there are too many distractions
around me

easy roadblocks
around me but also in my head
I am a distraction

this is why
I can’t write anymore
damnit

15 minutes in Synagogue

Family, Slice of Life

This woman is walking in late and chooses our aisle to sit in. We scrunch and stand and let her by.

I’ve been to this synagogue only once before, and the Bat Mitzvah is beautiful!

So what if she decides to sit right next to me, even though there’s a whole aisle to choose from.

“This is so nice,” she loudly whispers to me and adds, “I’m looking for my friend.” I wonder what wins with politeness: responding to the stranger talking to you during the service at a synagogue, or being quiet so you can pay attention to the service.

I decide to nod as kindly as I can, with a smile.

I’m trying to ignore her as she checks her phone, and sends an email. But then she starts loudly whispering again.

“Is this where they will have the baby naming too?”

I want to tell her that even though it’s my best friend’s daughter up there, and I have been here before, I still don’t know enough about this service to answer the question. But I realize that is a little long-winded.

I shrug my shoulders and say, “I’m actually from out of town. I’m not sure. Did you check the program?”

She nods and says she did. “I’m looking for my friend,” she repeats as she searches the room.

I turn my attention back to the prayers.

“Oh! There she is! But where’s the baby?” The woman whisper-exclaims.

That’s when she starts waving to try to get her friends attention.

The room is praying and she is waving and then her phone rings. She works to turn her phone off for a few seconds, and finally feels successful.

Only I notice that instead of turning the phone off, she has accidentally answered it.

My 16 year-old who has been trying to make sure he does all the things he’s supposed to do from turning off his phone to the sitting and the standing and the opening the book to the proper page, and turning the page in the correct direction finally widens his eyes a bit so only I can see.

I’m not actually sure what I should do. I look over at my son with my face scrunched and my eyes wide for just a second. I don’t want to talk during the praying, and I don’t want to embarrass the woman. So I just decide that the person who called her will either hang up or I guess, start praying.

A few minutes later the woman whispers again to tell me that it is her friend being celebrated. And then she decides she wants to go sit next to her friend.

So we scrunch and stand as she makes her way out of the aisle.

I look at my son, we take a deep breath, and we continue to watch my friends daughter as she does an amazing job leading prayers and speaking to us all.

I miss you

poetry, Slice of Life
Part of Slice of Life at Two Writing Teachers

I miss you.

I missed you in New York
City

the way you
drove
us and found parking

the way you
led us
through the neighborhoods

the way we always went to the
same
restaurants

the way you always
paid
on your credit card for points

the way you told us
later
how much we owed you

the way we’d
walk
forever

the way you sat in front
when we took a taxi
and talked to the driver

the way you popped
into a bar
for a beer

I want a beer
you’d say

I could live here
you’d say

how did you always
find the best
hidden bars?

later we would pour a glass of wine
sit in the hotel
or on the rooftop deck

we’d talk about our New York
memories
and eat the snacks Kris packed

Our last time in New York
City
you knew

you knew it was your
last
time

I told myself there would be
more
time

I missed you in New York
this
time

Building Stories

Reflections on teaching, Slice of Life
Part of Slice of Life at Two Writing Teachers

We were building a story. I say we, but the second graders were doing the heavy lifting. I will never tire of building stories with kids. Did you know they have the best ideas?

Our character was an ice cream cone, and he was having trouble. He kept melting in the summer! What he wanted most in the world was to be an Olympic swimmer, and he knew he had to find a vacation place somewhere on an iceberg so he could practice swimming without melting.

So good, right?

Things weren’t going very well for sprinkles — that was his name — sprinkles. First he forgot his plane ticket and luggage, then his flight was delayed. On the plane he ran into his arch -nemesis, Hot Chocolate and while he was running away, part of his cone broke off.

I’m telling you these details, not so you can steal this idea from the 2nd-graders and make millions of dollars in the picture book industry, but so you can understand why I was so excited about the kids’ ideas.

For each element of the story, kids turned and talked, and then we took a few ideas, and I picked one to go in the story. Or sometimes the ideas were all so good so we combined them all together. (Now the part where Sprinkles needs a vacation to an iceberg to practice swimming might make a little more sense to you.)

Each time I took ideas from the class, I would exclaim how it was, “so good!”

And it wasn’t a lie, or even a stretch. These ideas were so very good.

Maybe I should take the idea and make millions of dollars in the picture book industry. (No joke, I would love to publish an anthology of all the books classes have written. They are so good. So. Good.)

One second-grader was thrilled that his idea was picked for the class story. He was so excited, he interrupted my next sentence to point at himself, and raise his eyebrows very high.

“That great idea was from the birthday boy. Me.” He said.

“Well, that’s great!” I said, “Thank you.”

I started to go to the next part of our story.

“Well, aren’t you going to wish me a happy birthday?” He asked me, incredulous that I missed that part of the exchange. Of course I did, right away!

Finally we continued building our Sprinkles story, and I sent the kids off to make their own ending. But I was left thinking about that boy and his unabashed plea for celebration.

What would happen if we took a little of that energy and took it out for ourselves whenever we need to be celebrated?

Seems like a pretty good way to build your own story.

I’ve got nothing

poetry, Slice of Life

Part of Slice of Life Tuesdays on Two Writing Teachers. Join us!

I’ve got nothing
to say

My holiday
is over
Pushing snooze
Just makes me a loser
It doesn’t make the
clock stop

My daughter
is insisting on leaving
So cruel-
She’s going back to stupid school
Whatever, I’m proud but
allowed to miss her already
Damnit

The shade in my family room hates me
I guarantee – it sticks
every
time I try to close it
I hate it too
So there

I couldn’t figure out who would be knocking
so late and so weirdly at my door
But it was my ice maker
finally making ice cubes after all these years!
or actually just one tiny sliver of ice
then no more
shocking.

The dog barked loudly
for so long
Now I don’t know if a car parked
someone walked by
a deer ran through my yard
or a serial killer snuck up
He’s probably still waiting for me
Crouched nearby

Happy
New
Year

A Slice of Inspiration

Reflections on coaching, Reflections on teaching, Slice of Life
Part of Slice of Life Challenge at Two Writing Teachers. Join us!

A second grader took a break from working on his Top Ten Memories in writing the other day. He walked over to me to tell me about the time his dog ate chocolate with raisins. His eyes like saucers as he was telling me this important story. I shook my head with concern – scrunching my face with worry.

“She’s still alive though,” he reassured me.

“Phew!”

I asked him how his writing was going – seeing he only had a handful of memories written so far.

He smiled wide.

“I have a few written down. Now, all I gotta do, is —finish!” He said, walking back to his notebook that was waiting for him on the rug.

I’ve decided that is my new writing slogan: Now, all I gotta do, is —finish!

The slice I hadn’t started? Now, all I gotta do is finish.
The sample writing I have almost ready to send out? Now, all I gotta do is finish.
My book, started in small pieces? Now, all I gotta do is finish.

Actually, this slogan can work for all of life, I think.

The present wrapping that I haven’t started? Now, all I gotta do is finish.
My laundry sitting in the washer for the past couple hours? Now, all I gotta do is finish.
In the beginning stages of healing from betrayal? Now, all I gotta do is finish.

Thanks for the inspiration, kid.

Now, all I gotta do is finish.

Christmas Trees and Heartbreak

Family, Slice of Life
Part of Slice of Life Challenge at Two Writing Teachers. Join us!

A Christmas tree is not just
a Christmas tree
It’s
all
the Christmas trees

It’s my childhood trees —
A blur of colored lights
favorite ornaments that spark imagination

It’s that one time my parents got
a short tree
a short tree!
and put it on a table
I
was
heartbroken

A Christmas tree is my grandma’s trees
always in the same corner of her big house
wrapped with big lights
as we all gathered
well before we all
scattered

It’s my dance class trees-
full of magical ornaments
We’d take turns
dance up to the tree,
choose an ornament to dance as
the ballerina was easy,
but have you ever danced
like a candy cane would dance?
those ornaments, that tree, that studio, that teacher —
those memories live in a tainted haze now
this tends to happen
when 35 years later your dance teacher’s daughter has an affair with your husband
Still.
I do love the memory of that last dance
class before Christmas

It’s been awhile since I’ve
danced
as an ornament – but
I’ve unpacked them a lot
in a flood of memories
Mostly good —

Last year I packed away the 2 snow people in a hot cocoa packet from the year I was married
But I still thought about it when we decorated this year

Lights
make the tree
anyway
Like clothes make the man
Lights and memories

A Christmas tree is
little kids
clip, clip, clipping the tree wrapping off
branches falling
the brittle Christmas tree
poking us as we spun lights off
and needles covered our 100 year-old wood floors
bare branches by the curb
shoving a tree out the window
Well past January
My youngest sobbing, screaming,
“I want Christmas! It’s not over!”
Heartbroken

My tree is artificial now
pre-lit
pieces snapped together by teenagers
The bottom lights broken
by the new kitten
But it shines
like
all the trees

I sit by the tree
in the soft glow of
all the Christmas trees,
lights, ornaments, memories
and the thoughts of heartbreak too

Dr. Pepper & Life Lessons

Family, Slice of Life
Part of Slice of Life on Two Writing Teachers

After a doctor’s appointment, you stop for a little treat. A drink, lunch to bring back to school, something.

I don’t know if you have this tradition, or where this tradition started. I do know that when I was little, I’d always get grape gum after the doctor — the kind that has some sort of grape flavored juice that gushes out when you chew the gum.

So today after his appointment, I took my youngest to grab a snack. Dr. Pepper Zero Sugar was the choice drink. Now this makes so much more sense, I think. Doctor appointment equals Dr. Pepper!

Apparently, according to my almost 13-year-old, Dr. Pepper Zero Sugar is the best Dr. Pepper there is. I’m not sure John Green agrees, but I’ll let the opinion stand.

As we walked out of the store, I realized that we could have easily picked up a drink for my older son as well. I had told him we couldn’t when I dropped him off at school this morning, but why?

“I feel bad!” I said to E. “It would have been easy to grab an extra bottle of Dr. Pepper for your brother.”

E and I quickly discussed — the line was long now, and we really needed to get back to school.

“It’s okay,” we both said to each other as we crossed the parking lot. We reminded ourselves that it’s the person who has to go to the doctor’s appointment who gets the special treat. It was fine.

E said, “It’s just our empathy talking. It’s actually okay to not get him one.”

“Plus,” I added, “It’s not our job to make other people happy.”

E looked at me, raised his eyebrows and said, “Well, you might have taken it a little too far there.”

I had to try to explain. “It’s true. It’s not our job to take care of other people. (Aside from how I take care of you and your brother and your sister. That actually is my job.)”

I think I got a sigh from him as we got into the car.

It’s hard to explain this concept to your child, who it actually is your job to take care of!

But, maybe teaching it to my kids will help me get it straight in my own empathetic soul.

It’s not my job to make you happy.
It’s not my job to take care of you.
My needs are just as important as yours.

Say it with me, friends.

It’s not my job to make you happy.
It’s not my job to take care of you.
My needs are just as important as yours.